How far do your push your child?

[Mickey]

I went to see a friend of mine who was in town. She asked me to meet her at one of the high schools--she and her boyfriend were in town with their sons who wrestle. These boys are 5 years old. She said they were weighing the boys in for the state matches the next morning and then they were all going out to dinner.

Well, I went to meet her at the school and I was just sickened by what I witnessed. Her son "made weight" as they say, but her boyfriend's son didn't. He was trying hard to lose weight for this competition (which I think is sad) and he had 1 1/2 pounds to lose. However, when he weighed in, he was still half a pound over weight. So, they put a big heavy coat on him, put up the hood and made him run. They said that he could sweat that 1/2 pound off!

There were trash cans on all 4 corners of the gym and these kids were running around and stopping to spit in each trash can. They gave these kids gum and hard candy to produce saliva so they could lose body fluid that way, too. And they kept asking the kids if they needed to go to the bathroom.

They eventually took him to weigh again--4 ounces down, 4 to go. So, off this kid goes again (he weighs 45 pounds, 4 ounces at this point)--running with this big coat on and a big wad of gum in his mouth, spitting his little head off. Then my friend says, "I hope he makes weight this next time because these kids are starving--they haven't eaten all day trying to make weight."

And they weren't the only people doing all this. And she said that the older kids take laxatives to make weight.

Is it just me, or is this sick? I think this is child abuse.

And another thing that really upsets me about this is that my friend has been diagnosed with an eating disorder--she's not underweight, but she is obsessed with weight (and not just her own). I feel that she's imposing her obsession on her child.

She could tell I was horrified and kept saying, "The kids WANT to do this! They LOVE wrestling!"

I just think it's awful.

Are there other "sports" like this? Is this normal or typical for wrestling?

[Amy]

I come from a wrestling family. My Dad used to coasch it in college. My one brother wrestled for a couple of years. I don't remember him going to great lengths to make weight. I think he just entered the class associated with his current weight. For example, if he weighed 115lb, he would wrestle that weight class and not try to lose 5 lbs to get a better chance at winning a smaller weight class. I think its totally absurd for a 5 year old to be going to these lengths to wrestle. I would think it would mess with his physical development in the end.

I know wrestlers go to great lengths to lose fluids. Mostly jump roping and chewing skoal to take out any extra water. But I think all sports go to some outrageous lengths to make your child a competitor. Gymnastics is just as bad for girls. There was an article on what coaches would do to stop "development" so they can stay competitive for the olympics. Once kids stop doing sports for fun, than I think it gets twisted.

[Edited by Amy/CO on 03-25-2001 at 12:18 PM]

[KathyT]

Mickey that is horrifying. I cannot believe parents and/or coaches would condone that behaviour, and you are right, it sends a horrible message to these kids, not only about competition but about abusing your body in order for it to do what you want it to do. Sad, sad, sad.

[Amy2]

Micky, that is AWFUL! I don't think this person would be my friend anymore if she would do this to her child. Amy

[JeannieOR]

That's just insane...What ever happened to T-ball?

Have you considured contacting the fokes in charge of this athletic event? ... maybe write a letter with imput from a pediatrition and send a copy to your local newspaper.

[AnnW]

Is that a typo?? The boys were FIVE not 15??? Holy cow..those parents should be SHOT!!!!!!!! As ya'll know, we are big into sports, but there is no way in hell I would ever put my kids through something like that!!!!!!

[Diane]

I know in High School the boys will do things like this in order to loose weight in order to make their weight... but never thought that a parent would make their 5 year old do it! That's really sick! Not that I condone ANY age doing this but at least by the time their in High School it's pretty much THEIR choice and not the parents... although I've SEEN a few parents really push their kids, MUCH too hard. Sometimes I wonder if these kids are doing it for themselves or because their parents WANT/push them to do it for THEM. I think it's definitely sending kids the wrong message.

[Mickey]

Yes, they are FIVE!

Well, I'm glad to know that this is not normal.

Great idea, Jeannie--I will write a letter and find out where to send it (I'll contact the school). Not that it will change the way these moronic parents think, but I'll feel better for writing it, I'm sure.

And Amy, I have heard some dreadful things about gymnastics, too. It really is sickening that adults do this to kids!

I've known this girl for years, but I rarely see her as she lives about 5 hours from me. And while I know she has a different view of the world than me in a lot of respects, I would never have thought she'd condone, let alone participate, in something like this. Makes me so sad.

[Amy2]

Just a sweet story~ I was talking with my little ten year old godson who had joined the baseball team and he told me they had played their first game. I said I was really proud of him, did he have fun? Did they win? And he said "Well, we don't keep score, but I did get a hit!" I just loved that. We don't keep score. THAT is how children should play!

[KarlaB]

This is UNREAL! Who would allow thier five year old to be in a sport like this? I knew guys in high school who had to lose weight like that and I thought it was horrible then. I just cannot imagine a 5 yr old doing this and what it will teach them and/or do to their little bodies. :( Write the letter and let us know if you hear anything!

[RCT]

Not that far.....I'm still trying to encourage my child to color in the whole picture with crayons, and he is FIVE......I can't imagine someone doing this to thier child....that really disturbs me....what kind of people do this to thier children.....Scary.

[Leigh]

I know a guy that graduated with dh that died his first year in college from working out to participate in wrestling. I would never let child do that at any age let alone 5. I too think that this could be considered a form of child abuse. I just hope that these parents figure this out beforre it is to late for their ds.

[Boons]

That is AWFUL. I agree with whomever said I'd be second guessing my friendship if she thinks it's ok to put a 5 year old child through that. We were a BIG sports family and at times I think my father pushed me too hard but NOTHING even remotely close to this **shudder***