KathyT
03-28-2001, 04:25 PM
This was emailed to me today and I got a chuckle out of it. I am sure some of you have already seen it but I thought it was cute!
Mom's Dictionary
>
> AMNESIA: Condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to
> make love again.
>
> DUMBWAITER: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
>
> FAMILY PLANNING: The art of spacing your children the proper distance
> apart to keep you on the
> edge of financial disaster.
>
> FEEDBACK: The inevitable result when your baby doesn't appreciate the
> strained carrots.
>
> FULL NAME: What you call your child when you're mad at him.
>
> GRANDPARENTS: The people who think your children are wonderful even
> though they're sure you're
> not raising them right.
>
> HEARSAY: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
>
> IMPREGNABLE: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.
>
> INDEPENDENT: How we want our children to be as long as they do
> everything we say.
>
> OW: The first word spoken by children with older siblings
>
> PUDDLE: a small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry
> shoes into it.
>
> SHOW OFF: a child who is more talented than yours.
>
> STERILIZE: what you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and
> to your last baby's
> pacifier by blowing on it.
>
> TOP BUNK: where you should never put a child wearing Superman pajamas.
>
> TWO MINUTE WARNING: when the baby's face turns red and she begins to
> make those familiar
> grunting noises.
>
> VERBAL: able to whine in words
>
> WHODUNIT: none of the kids that live in your house...
>
> WEEKEND: when Dad gets to play golf while Mom catches up on the
> laundry, cleans the house,
> runs errands, etc.
Mom's Dictionary
>
> AMNESIA: Condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to
> make love again.
>
> DUMBWAITER: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
>
> FAMILY PLANNING: The art of spacing your children the proper distance
> apart to keep you on the
> edge of financial disaster.
>
> FEEDBACK: The inevitable result when your baby doesn't appreciate the
> strained carrots.
>
> FULL NAME: What you call your child when you're mad at him.
>
> GRANDPARENTS: The people who think your children are wonderful even
> though they're sure you're
> not raising them right.
>
> HEARSAY: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
>
> IMPREGNABLE: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.
>
> INDEPENDENT: How we want our children to be as long as they do
> everything we say.
>
> OW: The first word spoken by children with older siblings
>
> PUDDLE: a small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry
> shoes into it.
>
> SHOW OFF: a child who is more talented than yours.
>
> STERILIZE: what you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and
> to your last baby's
> pacifier by blowing on it.
>
> TOP BUNK: where you should never put a child wearing Superman pajamas.
>
> TWO MINUTE WARNING: when the baby's face turns red and she begins to
> make those familiar
> grunting noises.
>
> VERBAL: able to whine in words
>
> WHODUNIT: none of the kids that live in your house...
>
> WEEKEND: when Dad gets to play golf while Mom catches up on the
> laundry, cleans the house,
> runs errands, etc.