Gift Registry?

[Mickey]

My sister really didn't want to do this for her wedding and I've always thought it was kind of tacky--telling people "I have a list of all the stuff I want at the following stores!" or "Hey, buy this for me!" I know that according to modern etiquette (I believe I read it somewhere), that it's perfectly ok, but I think it's a huge marketing gimmick started by department stores. Then I heard Dr. Laura today say that she thinks it's awful--people are giving you a GIFT and you should be appreciative and take what you get. Too bad if it's a hassle exchanging or returning it.

What do you think about this?

[beth c]

I personally like a gift registry when I am purchasing a gift for someone. It lets me know what they like and also what they have already rec'd from someone else. I like to know I am getting them something that they will enjoy and use.

[AnnW]

I love when brides have a gift registry! I had one. I don't like it when you see a millions things on it..I have seen major appliances listed and furniture..now that is tacky!

If you don't like it, did you pick out china, silver and crystal? Isn't a registry just the same as telling people what your pattern is?

[Mickey]

Didn't have a big wedding, so no patterns or anything, but I do like to have a registry from which to choose something if I feel desperate, but I usually give cash.

I don't mind a registry, but when I receive a wedding announcement or invitation with the list of where the couple is registered, that just rubs me the wrong way for some reason. I would prefer to call a family member and ask if they are registered anywhere, but that's just me. And I have seen major appliances and furniture listed, too! That is REALLY tacky! Why not add, "And we're also registered at the Lexus and Toyota dealerships!" LOL! "p.s. If you're thinking about buying us a house, we really like the west side best!" ;)

[Diane]

I really like having a gift registry when I am purchasing a gift for someone. I'd much rather have choices than to go shopping with absolutely no idea's... it drives me crazy trying to find something!!! :crazyroll I feel much better wrapping a gift I know they want and will enjoy than to purchase something they may end up having to return. I don't think it's tacky at all... :)

Bye... :wave:

[angie r]

I think the use of a gift registry is great. Although I always give cash for weddings I love it for baby showers. I always register dk's on toysrus.com for their birthdays/Christmas and my family loves that.

hmmm....major appliances and furniture, now that would have been nice! I especially love the auto dealership.

[AnnW]

Originally posted by Mickey
Didn't have a big wedding, so no patterns or anything, but I do like to have a registry from which to choose something if I feel desperate, but I usually give cash.

I don't mind a registry, but when I receive a wedding announcement or invitation with the list of where the couple is registered, that just rubs me the wrong way for some reason. I would prefer to call a family member and ask if they are registered anywhere, but that's just me. And I have seen major appliances and furniture listed, too! That is REALLY tacky! Why not add, "And we're also registered at the Lexus and Toyota dealerships!" LOL! "p.s. If you're thinking about buying us a house, we really like the west side best!" ;)

I have never seen it listed on an wedding invitation...that would be so tacky! I have seen it on baby shower. I have never given cash.

[KarlaB]

I like the gift registry, but a few have rubbed me the wrong way. 1) One couple registered for Play Station, big screen tv, etc. Aargh! In fact the whole list was like that. They had been living together and didn't list any necessity type things for the home and if they did it was WAY expensive. :rolleyes: 2) Another couple didn't really want half the stuff they registered for, but wanted to be able to return it for money! Double aargh! They wanted to know if it was tacky to just ask for $$! HELLO!
I also think it is tacky to list on the invite where a couple is registered.

[dotcommom]

When we got married we didn't have a gift registry. Family and friends spoke to our parents to see what we needed and got together to purchase big items on their own. It was wonderful to see what each person gave from thier personal self and not what was on a list we made up! I'm not a big fan of gift registries, I prefer to give something personal to the couple. Oh yeah, we didn't have any duplicates either!

[Leigh]

We didn't have a registry either, and we only received one duplicate gift. I think that as long as they register and have gifts to fit anyone's price range, it is okay,but way too many I have received have nothing in my price range. I think it is tacky to see it on the invitation too.

[Lynda/WA]

I have mixed feelings about them. I can see it would be great for things like china patterns or if their taste is very diverse from your own. On the other hand I resented being told on the invitation where they were registered. Since this was for a baby shower given by my SIL's best friend, I can only imagine how upsetting it would be to get a wedding invitation made out by the bride TELLING me where to shop.
I have to admit some of my resentment may have been because when my kids were born she didn't get us anything. Then as soon as she found out she was pregnant she began telling me things like *A high chair would make a great baby shower gift*. I may have liked getting gift ideas if it was a different person.
One thing I don't like about registies is that the recipient knows exactly how much you paid. I am positive my SIL did that since they have already asked me (and others) how much a gift to them costed. I love shopping and getting the very best deal on the best present I can find. Something that is personal. I hate it when it's just a dollar value. To my SIL's credit she did have gifts listed from the very cheap to very expensive. Most were in the higher price range. Nearly all of those in the price range I wanted were already taken by the time I got to the one store she had listed (Sears)

BTW, at my wedding, I didn't receive a single duplicate and all the gifts where great. They were gifts from people in 3 different states that didn't even meet until the wedding day much less discuss what everyone was getting. My mom did ask me for ideas that she could give out if asked as well as what colors I wanted in what room. Most of the gifts I loved the best were handmade (quilts & cross-stiched items). You can't do that with a registry!

[Amy2]

We were registered and it was great, but I do think it's tacky to list where you're registered on the invitation. If the person is close enough to you to be invited to your wedding, they're close enough to know who to ask to find out where you're registered!

I also think it's tacky not to have a wide price range to choose from. Some of us can't spend a hundred bucks on a wedding gift, especially if we have four weddings that summer. So I think it's nice to have many different kinds of gifts.

I also like to get more personal things, though that can be risky.

For a friend of mine who had her baby at home, I took up a collection from all her friends and had her house professionally cleaned, blinds done, everything. She LOVED it! She had a child already, so she didn't really need anything, plus, people usually bring a little something when they come to meet the baby anyway.