Yet, another question

[Leigh]

Okay, tomorrow I will be on cycle day (CD)#35.I am pretty sure that I ovulated (o'd) somewhere between CD#16-18. The docotor told me to test on CD#35, so I plan on testing in the morning. I took a test on Sunday morning, and it was negative, but I hope that I tested too early. I have been experiencing tiredness, and some cramping. About a week after O (ovulation), I experienced nausea off and on, some bb (breast)soreness, and major cravings for plain m&ms. I am scared to test tomorrow because I really do not want to see another BFN,(big fat negative) but do you think that if I get a BFN tomorrow, I should demand a blood test just to be sure? If you o, do you have to have AF (aunt flo) visit? I have been told conflicting things on this. I have been told that if you o, AF must visit. Then I was told that AF does not have to visit if you o. Does this make any since? Please help me!!!! I am so stupid when it comes to TTC (trying to conceive)

[AnnW]

Been visiting the TTC boards?
Leigh, I say this with all the sincerity and love in my heart, while I do not believe that infertility (not saying that you are) is caused by stress..your mental health is not going to survive this level of anxiety you are giving yourself!! I know the roller coaster you are on. I also know saying relax is like trying to shovel ice in a snow storm! Or for us southern folk..bailing water in a flood! LOL Yes, you can demand a blood test, but honestly, what difference does it make if you don't "know" you are pregnant till 2 cycles? What changes would you make? are you smoking? are you boozing it up? will you stop having sex? Live your life. Love your husband. Have great sex or even bad sex often ;) but don't let this consume you.

[Jeff]

I would agree with Ann. We weren't in the same boat but had tried for some time with no luck so we got out the books and timed it and did the sex thing everyday then every other day etc. We were extremely uptight and stressed about it. Finally we just said to Hell with it and put it in God's hands. Several months later with few times invested it happened. I'm not saying it will happen for you and I am not saying to know what you or anyone else is going through or the heartache you feel when it just isn't happening but that is our story. It didn't take us 5-10 years like it does some, but it did take over a year.

[Leigh]

Thanks. I think I am going to test tomorrow, and then try to take a break, or as ya'll call it relax. LOL I know that I am letting it consume me, but I have waited almost 6 years for dh to tell me he was ready, and now I am beginning to feel hopeless all over again. Thanks for all of ya'lls support. It has been a lifesaver.

[AnnW]

Leigh, it may have been 6 years, but you are still very young. Don't let this consume you.

[Marla]

(((((Leigh)))))

I have to agree with Ann and Jeff. I remember when one of my friends was having a hard time getting pregnant. They too were completely stressed out; got the calendar ready, the books, the timers, the charts etc. Finally their doctor told them just to relax and put all that stuff away. A couple months later, they were much more relaxed and pregnant.

Good luck to you, and keep us posted. Remember that you have your friends at IB to support you. Relax and I know that it will happen.

[Leigh]

Thanks! :)

[aztec_judy]

Leigh,
I know your very anxious, but stressin over it will NOT help any.
And I agree with everyone else, throw those things out the window... have a glass of wine and have at it... lololol
For me it was a surge of energy an lost weight (felt like I could have painted the whole house once... lolol). And that was with the 4 preggies and 3 miscarriages. It will happen when it happens; but it will happen faster with a relaxing attitude instead of a stressful attitude for sure.
And not everyone gets the sickness, or the cravings or anything else. So just relax. Yours will happen according to your own system.
But if it brings you peace of mind take the test. And if it comes back neg again ... then do some relaxing exercises. Or take up a craft or anything that will help you to try to relax. Have a wine cooler, or a couple of them along with a candle lite dinner. Put on some quiet relaxing music and have funnnn !!!
But work at NOT thinking about it.
AND yes it is hard to do that, especially when your soo stressed over it. Do some stretching exercises anything that will help you to relax and NOT think!!!!!
I will pray that you learn to relax so it can happen (but hopefully you are already preggie!!! if what your uncle says is correct..)
and GOOD LUCK GIRL...

[aztec_judy]

Oh and also the last preggie was a surprise to me, was using the rythm method ... did the day counting and didn't do anything on days that was not suppose to be safe.... wellll that didn't work at allll... lololol
When I went to doc, he told me that I was NOT getting my new birth control pill, because I was preggie... lolol So just sit back an relax .... lololol

[littlesista06]

Hang in there sweetie. I've walked in your shoes and know it can be with you 24/7.
I'll share with you what my infertility doc said to me about relaxing and the well meant advice to forget about it for a while .... he said that's like telling an insomniac to just go take a nap! ROFL If I heard that once, I heard it a million times. LOL

I haven't read how your dh is taking this, is he concerned?

[AnnW]

Originally posted by littlesista06
I'll share with you what my infertility doc said to me about relaxing and the well meant advice to forget about it for a while .... he said that's like telling an insomniac to just go take a nap! ROFL If I heard that once, I heard it a million times. LOL



too true, I always hated when people impliled that my infertility was somehow all in my head! Hey..wanna see the xrays? LOL BUT, with all that said, in hindsight, be excited, anxious, happy, but not obsessive...cause that don't help at all!

[Leigh]

Originally posted by littlesista06
Hang in there sweetie. I've walked in your shoes and know it can be with you 24/7.
I'll share with you what my infertility doc said to me about relaxing and the well meant advice to forget about it for a while .... he said that's like telling an insomniac to just go take a nap! ROFL If I heard that once, I heard it a million times. LOL

I haven't read how your dh is taking this, is he concerned?

Thanks to everyone again! I just can't stress enough that I don't know what I would do without ya'll.

As far as my dh, he is being very supportive. Both of us really thought that last month was the month, and I did take it hard as I expected I would. Dh was there to comfort me as I cried, and he told me he was disappointed too, but that he hoped in time it would happen, and we would just keep trying. I still haven't started, and I can't get a hold of my doctor. When I do get a hold of her this time, I am going to let her know that if she doesn't become more available, I am going to find another doctor. I realize that I am not one of their important prioritys and that some of my questions may seem silly or petty, but I am still a patient and I began last Thursday, and I still haven't heard anything from them. I am still pretty sure that I ovulated, so I am not sure what is going on with my body. The doctor did tell me though that she wanted to try clomid for 6 months before they began checking dh. I have been under a lot of stress teaching lately too, so I know that is not helping. I guess I am just going to have to accept that it will happen if it is meant to happen, and it will happen when it is the right time. Thanks again everyone!!!

[Jeff]

Originally posted by Leigh
Thanks to everyone again! I just can't stress enough that I don't know what I would do without ya'll.

As far as my dh, he is being very supportive. Both of us really thought that last month was the month, and I did take it hard as I expected I would. Dh was there to comfort me as I cried, and he told me he was disappointed too, but that he hoped in time it would happen, and we would just keep trying. I still haven't started, and I can't get a hold of my doctor. When I do get a hold of her this time, I am going to let her know that if she doesn't become more available, I am going to find another doctor. I realize that I am not one of their important prioritys and that some of my questions may seem silly or petty, but I am still a patient and I began last Thursday, and I still haven't heard anything from them. I am still pretty sure that I ovulated, so I am not sure what is going on with my body. The doctor did tell me though that she wanted to try clomid for 6 months before they began checking dh. I have been under a lot of stress teaching lately too, so I know that is not helping. I guess I am just going to have to accept that it will happen if it is meant to happen, and it will happen when it is the right time. Thanks again everyone!!!

I think its a good idea to talk to your Doctor about the fact you haven't been contacted. It could be the doc but it could also be the staff not getting messages to her, the phone system not working properly, etc.

[PamE]

Leigh, this is probably a big duuuhhh, but why are they waiting to check your dh? ?( I guess it just bugs me that doctors don't cover all the bases as quickly as possible and then go from there, you know? It gripes me too that your doc hasn't called you back. I guess I have to agree with Jeff, though, it could be the fault of the system rather than the doctor. Still, they should be on top of things. (my not so humble opinon)

{{{HUGS}}} Keeping my fingers crossed for you. :)

[littlesista06]

Pam, do you think it could be insurance reasons? I'm going based on how it worked for us. We couldn't get infertility coverage (which started w/dh being tested) until we had been trying for a full year. My ob/gyn tried clomid and did the dye thru the tubes procedure, then he was done and we could move on to the "big guns". LOL

Leigh, are these docs infertility ones or just a new ob/gyn?

I feel bad asking question after question when at the same time, we're trying to get your mind off of it! :\ But, we're here for ya babe! ;) I'm glad to hear your dh is supportive and 'there' for you. It's real important that he understands how you feel everyday waiting and waiting - sounds like you've got a good man. :)

[AnnW]

I feel like this is an invasion of your privacy, but here goes! LOL ;)
Maybe I am misunderstanding, but haven't you only been trying for less than 4 months and you are only 26....why would your doc even suspect anything?

[Leigh]

Originally posted by PamE
Leigh, this is probably a big duuuhhh, but why are they waiting to check your dh? ?( I guess it just bugs me that doctors don't cover all the bases as quickly as possible and then go from there, you know? It gripes me too that your doc hasn't called you back. I guess I have to agree with Jeff, though, it could be the fault of the system rather than the doctor. Still, they should be on top of things. (my not so humble opinon)

{{{HUGS}}} Keeping my fingers crossed for you. :)

I think that they are waiting to check him because we are pretty sure that it is me not ovulating that is the problem. My doc told me that they do not consider clomid a loss until you have been on it for 6 months. Insurance probably has something to do with it to.

[Leigh]

Originally posted by littlesista06
Pam, do you think it could be insurance reasons? I'm going based on how it worked for us. We couldn't get infertility coverage (which started w/dh being tested) until we had been trying for a full year. My ob/gyn tried clomid and did the dye thru the tubes procedure, then he was done and we could move on to the "big guns". LOL

Leigh, are these docs infertility ones or just a new ob/gyn?

I feel bad asking question after question when at the same time, we're trying to get your mind off of it! :\ But, we're here for ya babe! ;) I'm glad to hear your dh is supportive and 'there' for you. It's real important that he understands how you feel everyday waiting and waiting - sounds like you've got a good man. :)

The doctor that I am going to is a regular ob/gyn. I have been seeing her since we returned from Germany, but until I started TTC, I only saw her once a year, so I guess that comes out too not too many times that I have saw her. I really like the doctor. It is the office staff that I have problems with.

[Leigh]

Originally posted by AnnW
I feel like this is an invasion of your privacy, but here goes! LOL ;)
Maybe I am misunderstanding, but haven't you only been trying for less than 4 months and you are only 26....why would your doc even suspect anything?

It is not an invasion of privacy at all because I have put all my business up here for any and everyone.

I have actually been actively TTC for 10 months now, and the reason that they are suspecting anything is because since I got off of the pills, I have not had AF without having some sort of medication to start her. They are thinking that I am not ovulating on my own. In the 10 months I have been TTC, I have only had 3 cycles. I guess that is why it is so frusterating to me. I know you have to move on to the next cycle to try again, and I am not able to move on to the next cycle without getting a hold of the doc, and now they won't call me back. UGH!!!!

Anyway thanks for letting me vent.

[AnnW]

(((((Leigh)))))) I agree with everyone else, you need to find a doc that is responsive to your needs and available.

[JAK]

Originally posted by Leigh
It is not an invasion of privacy at all because I have put all my business up here for any and everyone.

I have actually been actively TTC for 10 months now, and the reason that they are suspecting anything is because since I got off of the pills, I have not had AF without having some sort of medication to start her. They are thinking that I am not ovulating on my own. In the 10 months I have been TTC, I have only had 3 cycles. I guess that is why it is so frusterating to me. I know you have to move on to the next cycle to try again, and I am not able to move on to the next cycle without getting a hold of the doc, and now they won't call me back. UGH!!!!

Anyway thanks for letting me vent.

After I stopped taking the pill I only had 3 periods in a 12 month time frame. At the time we were TTC as well and it was frustrating. Took so many pregnancy tests it wasn't funny. I didn't go to the dr because I just thought it was my body trying to get used to being off the pill. I scheduled and appt with the dr and then got 2 periods in a row, so then canceled the appt. I was then "regular" for the next 5 months. When I didn't start on the 6th month, I just thought it was my body again. The next month I didn't start either and I had been so tired. I took a test and it was positive. So I didn't even find out I was pregnant with dd until I was 9 weeks along.

I really hope that you get some answers soon. Just thought I'd share what I went through because in a way it sounds like our bodies did the same thing after getting off the pill.

[Leigh]

Thanks for sharing your story Jen. Our stories do sound similar, but I just never did start. LOL! If I wasn't TTC, it could be a blessing. :lol: