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Ryleigh
04-27-2001, 06:11 PM
Thanks for all the support and encouragement! I thank God every day for letting me find this site and so many wonderful people. You are all angels in my book :angel:

dd refused to talk to either one of us the other night. Just burried her face in her pillow and wouldn't budge.
If she wasn't going to talk then we decided that we would do the talking and she could just listen. We went to her room together, and told her how much we loved her and are worried about her. We also told her how scared we were when we couldn't find her. We reassured her that we were not angry, just concerned and that it was ok if she didn't want to talk right now, she could come to us when she was ready. When she didn't respond, we just quietly left. Went out to the living room and bawled my eyes out. dh tried to talk to her again later, but I was in no condition to approach her. She still refused to talk. I finally convinced dh to go to bed around 2:30am. He had a 7:00 meeting that he couldn't miss. I couldn't sleep, so just sat back and tried to figure out what was happening and must have dosed off on the couch. About 4:30 I felt something brush against me and opened my eyes. dd was standing there trying to cover me with a blanket. I just looked at her and she burst into tears. I grabbed her and held her and we cried together. We both must have fell asleep like that. Next thing I knew I was waking up on the couch with dd in my arms. I found a note in the kitchen saying dh had dropped ds at MIL's house, and he would be back as soon as his meeting let out.
I kept dd home from school with me and we had a long talk. I still don't know all the details but things are looking up anyway.
She never was too far from home. Just in her tree house in the back yard. She appologised for scaring us so bad, said she doesn't know why she did it, she's just confused, but doesn't know what she is confused about.
She is happy about the babies but scared of how things are going to change.
She is afraid to grow up and "have to move away" from Mommy and Daddy!
She doesn't want to move and leave all her friend and the gym club.
This is just a small bit of what we were able to get out of her. I think it has been building for some time. I am working on arranging a 'girls day out' once a month. She seems quite excited about that but I think it's going to take more than just extra attention to get her through this. We are concidering outside help.
My emotions are still shaky but we are getting through this. She assures me she will never 'run away' again.
now she is after ds. He came home and said' Your a brat, you made mommy cry' They have always got along so well, I hate to see anything come between them.
Thanks again for all the kind words. You mean the world to me. :heart:

RCT
04-27-2001, 06:30 PM
I am so glad to hear that you and your dh did talk to your dd....it must be scary for her, three new babies....and a move....how old is your dd again....you two sound like wonderful parents, I am sure I would have screamed and handled it all wrong.....godbless both of you and I hope communications are always left open for you.

Ryleigh
04-27-2001, 06:55 PM
Not sure how much we actually handled right but seems to be going ok so far.
We have our first mommy/daughter day tomorrow.
Going to pamper ourselves a bit. Get our nails done. New spring outfits and a photo session at 'Glamour Shots' before I get all fat, bloated and look like a beached whale!lol. dd, now 9, seems very excited.
B'day party on Sun. for ds, who will be 5 on Thurs. As you can see, a busy weekend ahead so may not post again til late Sunday or Monday. Gotta go. dh wants a turn to say Hi before we head out to MIL's (again).
Talk to you all soon!

RCT
04-27-2001, 07:03 PM
I hope the rest of this weekend goes great for ya....sounds like fun the glamor shoots, I had it done with my girlfriend before we both got married and it sure is a great memory...your never going to look like a beached whale....just beautiful...I am sure.....sounds like your daughter is going through lots of stuff and being 9 can be hard.....I am so happy that your communication is so good.....have fun this weekend...both of you....well all of you....8 of you?

BigDaddy
04-27-2001, 07:06 PM
Ryleigh's about said it all. Just wanted to take the opportunity to thank all you lovely board members who shared your thoughts and prayers. I am proud that we have formed a very strong and loving family unit, and I know that together we will get through even the toughest of times.
My only question is .... if we are having this much trouble with just two kids, what are we in for with three more. I need a nerve pill just thinking about it.

Big Daddy, signing off. :wave:

KarlaB
04-27-2001, 09:59 PM
Originally posted by BigDaddy
My only question is .... if we are having this much trouble with just two kids, what are we in for with three more. I need a nerve pill just thinking about it.

Big Daddy, signing off. :wave:

:lol: LOL! :lol:

You guys sound like wonderful parents and with the way you handled things you will raise some fabulous dks!! I think your dd is reaching out to you/asking for help in the only way she knows how to right now and I think the way you guys approached this situation was great! Yelling would have just set her back a little more - she needs your support & love and you're giving it to her! She's a lucky girl. Hang in there with all that all of you are going through and be sure to lean on your IB family :tinysmile whenever you need to!!

AnnW
04-27-2001, 10:06 PM
Bless your heart...bless her heart!! Has she perhap overheard ya'll talking about cutting back on things? Is that why she thought she would have to quit her activities?
I hope all gets on an even keel soon!!!!

Diane
04-27-2001, 11:47 PM
I'm glad to hear that everything is much better... It sounds like she's got a lot on her plate right now and she's probably a little bit overwhelmed about all of the changes that about to take place. You handled everything just wonderfully, and don't worry about when the other two arrive... I have no doubts that you'll both do just fine. :)

Diane... :wave:

angie r
04-28-2001, 12:11 AM
That is three Diane P!!

Ryleigh/BigDaddy - You did a great job. I am so proud of the way you handled this situation. I hope you have a super great time this weekend and happy birthday to your ds!!! :bday:

Linda/NE
04-28-2001, 08:46 AM
I know I'm late coming in on this, but I hope everything works out okay. Sounds like you handled it wonderfully!!

As for how to handle more than 2 kids, it sounds like you'll do just fine.

A thought that crossed my mind while reading this is, your dd is the oldest right? That's a tough position to be in. My oldest (ds-11) often commented how we paid too much attention to the younger ones and didn't have time for him. Although he gets more privileges than they do, he also has more responsibility and more is expected of him. I think the girls day out is a super idea!!

Moving has to be hard to. When ever we've faced the decision to move dh has always said that they're kids they'll adjust, but I always felt so bad for the kids. It's not easy. That's so wonderful that you have such open communication with your kids that your dd feels she can talk to you.

You've got a lot of adjustments ahead, but I think everything will work out for the best. Just take it day by day.

Best of luck to you!!!! :)

Leigh
04-28-2001, 09:43 AM
I am glad that things seem to be working out for all of you. I think that a girls day out is a great idea. My mom and I never had official ones, but I remember when we went out by ourselves we could always do things we couldn't do with my dad and I enjoyed them. Ya'll are still in my thoughts and keep us updated. We are always here for you.:)

Diane
04-28-2001, 08:12 PM
Originally posted by angie r
That is three Diane P!!

Ryleigh/BigDaddy - You did a great job. I am so proud of the way you handled this situation. I hope you have a super great time this weekend and happy birthday to your ds!!! :bday:

Oops... sorry about that. Thanks for the correction Angie... LOL THREE!!! :)

Diane... :wave: