I want to smoke!

[RCT]

And well, I did yesterday, have a cig. with my sil...I can't believe how easy it was to do it again...after all my complaining about how its so awful....someone who has been temped and still not doing it, help, Oh and I got on the scale this morning and I am up 2 pounds, now thats not a lot, but I can see where this is going...dh is sick again...and I sent him to the doctors, don't get me wrong ladies, I love this man, but I am convinced he is making himself sick through stress.....either that or he is becoming a hypocontriact.....I want my butts back, my mini vacation from the world....Am I so weak that I can't handle any amount of stress....ARGH...looking for something, I can't have....

[AnnW]

DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's funny, I don't really have a craving for them anymore, but I am so flipped out about the weight I have put on that I have considered going back.....but I won't.
You can do sweetie!!!!!!
DH kind of went through that hypochodriac phase too, then it was anger, denial ect.....Do you have a doctor that give him a complete physical, find out nothing is wrong and then put his mind at ease?

[RCT]

Thanks for the encouragment....I hated being a slave to smoking, I hated it for so many reasons, that's why I quit, I guess I just want an out....

as for DH, yes he has had a complete physical, but the PVC (or extra heartbeats) they are real, and non threatening, he feels that they are threatening, whatever, he also had a lower and upper GI done recently, well they found some fatty pockets in his upper gi and buildup on his large intesten, which he was told he could have more testing done, but that this was normal....He is just a big BABY lately, he does have a fever, and I sent him to the doctor right now as a matter of fact, because I think he has strept throad.....so antibiotics would do him a world of good.....I guess this really isn't about me wanting to smoke huh, I just want something to control....myself....

the weight will come off...I keep saying that like I can will the weight off.....guess I need to take the energy I have now that I am not smoking a get out and move....

Why are men so doomy and gloomy when something happenes to them, I thought this man was stronger than he his and it really surprises me, and kinds ticks me off a little too....thats awful I know, but who should I say this too, my closetest friends are my SIL, not the person to complain about your dh too...LOL..

Thanks again AnnW...I was really feeling weak and I was going to cave for sure....

[AnnW]

I don't know, but it does seem to be pretty universal. They can handle all sorts of crisis, but when it is their health it really throws them for a loop. I think it's that they are naturally problem solvers, they want to "fix" things..well sometimes you just can't fix your health and it makes you realize that you are vulnerable!
I hear you about the control...I am really surprised by how out of control I feel. I didn't realize that smoking did that for me.

[RCT]

yeah, If I could use the control I had with my smoking habit, on to with my eating problem, I would be ok...I want to loose 17 pounds by August 18th, thats almost a pound a week, lets see if I can do it.....want to look good while I'm on vacation.....
I know I am just romanticizing about wanting to smoke again, or am I threatening myself? HUM...have to think about that, all it will do is punish me....
Oh and dh just called, he has full blown Strept...and a 14 days supplie of penicillin...LOL....thank goodness he went...now he can feel better......hope it's not contatiguous to me and the kids....that's all I need....LOL....

[AnnW]

Poor guy...hope he feels better!

[KarlaB]

Hope things are looking up soon. I can't relate to the smoking, but I can to weight loss. I think it is a constant battle and I continue to fluctuate back and forth with the last ten pounds. Also, dh is the same way when sick. When we were first married he had a horrific migraine and I ended up taking him to the dr. While there he asked for his MOM! :rolleyes: I about fell over and was :nervous: about what the upcoming years would bring! LOL! We still laugh about it, but I always say it's one thing to have dh home and another to have him home....sick! Glad your dh got some meds today for his strep and hopefully he is feeling better soon! Hang in there with not smoking. You have done so well with it - keep it up!!

[kacee]

Please don't do it!! You have to be tough. Think of your little ones. Then think of the dough that you will save by not starting up the habit again.

BTW, How are your little birdies doing? I envy your parakeets. I remember that you were hatching eggs. How exciting for you!!

[kat]

Originally posted by kacee
Please don't do it!! You have to be tough. Think of your little ones. Then think of the dough that you will save by not starting up the habit again.

Stay strong! You can do this.

I had a bad cigarette experience over the weekend. We made room reservations late for Bible Bowl and got the last 7 rooms. Turns out they were smoking rooms. I'm allergic. I nearly gagged when we went in. It reeked. The sheets, blankets, pillows, everything. I could not sleep. Then my head started to clog up. At 1:30 I put on some coffee, pulled a chair over to the bathroom for light, and read and studied till time to get ready. During the test my head was pounding from the congestion and lack of sleep.
We always get non-smoking rooms and even then you can tell if someone has smoked in them, but at least everything is not saturated with smoke.

[Leigh]

I am so sorry that everything is going wrong at once. I hope things get better soon, and just keep resisting that temtation. Maybe you could use the money you used to buy cigs with to go to Vegas in Oct. LOL!!!

[RCT]

I was around two smokers....I didn't even want one...It was so cool, and I had three healthy meals....so that's one day done right.....LOL

kat I agree about the smell, I am always replused by the smell of stale smoke, or fresh for that matter, and can't believe I used to reak like that...LOL...my SIL who doesn't smoke, sprayed me with her Shalamar, just so I could smell pretty all day, and could linger in the sweetness....

Sorry Kacee, I'm not hatching birdies, but am curious to know who is.....

Dh is feeling better, I bought him some more juices and he is lazying around feeling good...finally...I am off to bed I have a terrible headache...went to Walmart for some flowers for the garden and it was stinky like fertilizer, now I have a headache...oh well....
Thanks for all the support...where would I be with out all of you.

[kat]

Good for you Renee, before long those days will turn into years and you won't even remember the old you. Hope your headache is gone by morning.

I still haven't had time to plant flowers, just have my beds all cleaned out and ready to go. Maybe this weekend.

[Diane]

I'm glad you resisted the temptatiotn... and I hope you are feeling much better this morning. I'm lso glad to hear that your dh is feeling much better. Sometimes when THEIR sick it's much worse for you than when your sick. LOL

Take care...

Diane... :wave:

[RCT]

Originally posted by Diane P.
I'm glad you resisted the temptatiotn... and I hope you are feeling much better this morning. I'm lso glad to hear that your dh is feeling much better. Sometimes when THEIR sick it's much worse for you than when your sick. LOL

Take care...

Diane... :wave:

how true that is, He is feeling better, and my headache is better now too....getting ready to go out and garden....Just keep telling myself that I don't want to die, and if I smoke I'll be closer to dying.....

[Ryleigh]

Hooray for you!! :yippee::bounce: You were able to resist your temptation! Keep it up. It might be hard sometimes but you can do it. :thumb:

Glad your headache is better. I had a bit of a migraine starting last night. Had to resist the meds. until I talk to the doctor. This is the time of year they really get me. I think they are triggered by allergies: grass, mold, pollen. It's more just a regular old headache today but not very bad.

[KarlaB]

Originally posted by Ryleigh
Hooray for you!! :yippee::bounce: You were able to resist your temptation! Keep it up. It might be hard sometimes but you can do it. :thumb:

Glad your headache is better. I had a bit of a migraine starting last night. Had to resist the meds. until I talk to the doctor. This is the time of year they really get me. I think they are triggered by allergies: grass, mold, pollen. It's more just a regular old headache today but not very bad.

When I was pregnant with ds #1 I had severe headaches. :( Hopefully you can get thru Spring without too many bad ones. Other than the headaches, how have you been feeling?

[Ryleigh]

Karla

Other than the headaches ~ which I am pleaged with pregnant or not, I feel great. If it weren't for the absence of a certain monthly friend I would have no idea of the situation I'm in.
I didn't have many complications with the first two either. Just dreading the stretch marks. One was bad enough, how will three fit in there.
Only gained 18 lbs. with dd. 26 with ds. They were both pretty good size babies as well. dd 7lb 8 oz. ds 7lb 4 oz.
See what happens in another few months.
dh says I'm extra emotional, dd keeps telling me to 'chill out' I don't feel any different but maybe I am just blind to it all. :biggrin::bigcry::biglaugh::bawling::silly::nervous::sillyface

[KarlaB]

Originally posted by Ryleigh
dh says I'm extra emotional, dd keeps telling me to 'chill out' I don't feel any different but maybe I am just blind to it all.

LOL!! Glad you're feeling good! I think I was more emotional with my second pregnancy than with my first. You've got lots going on right now so you're definitely entitled to being emotional!!! I wish we could see you pregnant! :) I bet you'll stay little - sounds like you did with the first two! You must post pics when they arrive!!!! :) :) :)

[Ryleigh]

So, how goes the big temptation ? Are you still holding strong?

[RCT]

do I say.....not good, I'm back at it.....not heavy, but one is too much right....thinking about putting it down again....please don't bash me..... :( I know its awful.........thanks for asking about me, sorry I had to confess....

[KarlaB]

No bashing here. Smoking is a hard thing for people to give up and I think when the time is right you will do it. My brother said he would never quit and he finally did all on his own - when he was ready. Hang in there!

[AnnW]

Hang in there sweetie!!! Don't beat yourself up about this. You will do it when the time is right.

[Ryleigh]

Sorry to hear you had a slip up, but hang in there. With a little time and persistance you can do it. Like you said, one is too many, but look at it this way:
One less is a good start.

[RCT]

been glued to the puter for the last couple of days, and wow, no smoking for me....LOL...takes to much time away for reading the boards and searching EBAY.... :lol:

[Ryleigh]

That's what we're here for...... stay tuned!!!:thumb: