I need a sounding board here

[littlesista06]

Ok this is the deal - dd's school sucks. (and I don't ever use that word)

I have an opportunity to use my employer's name/address as dd's child care provider and she can go to the better school in our area. I'm timid about bending the rules.... but for her best interest and a better school environment, I think I'm going to go for it.

1. She will actually know more kids than she does at her present school.
2. This school has what I am mostly looking for - an ACTIVE PTA and the higher SOL scores (don't know if anyone else's state has them)
2. And families "like us" - ones who care about school and want to be involved in any way possible.

I think if I don't move her, we are soooo going to regret it - it's all we talk about on a daily basis - is that we've got to get her out of that school. And no, the obvious - moving, is not an option at this time. That's something else that bothers me - we'll move in the next 5 years (hopefully sooner) and I just don't know if it's a good idea to start moving her every 3 or 4 years..... ugh. All I want is the best that we can give her.

Dh tells me I need to think about this - so here ya go guys.... I'm throwing you a bone so let me know what you think and if you'd do the same thing. (please )

[Diane]

I would go for it too... in a second. If it's anything that would make life a little better for my dd... I would do it. Next year I will have a little girl in my daycare who will be using my home address as her's, just so she can go to our school area and also so she won't have to leave my day care. The school in my area is also a lot better school than the one she would end up going to if she used her own address. It's done all the time... so I wouldn't feel guilty doing it. Good luck...

Diane...

[MaryL]

I do it! My boys do not go to our neighborhood school...if fact they go to a school in a different city than where they live! LOL They have made wonderful friends both at school, and in our own neighborhood. Dh and I plan to have them attend our local middle school (6th grade), as this will be the next "natural" transition time for them. Who knows, though. Maybe we'll keep them at their current school until 8th grade ends? Only time will tell, and our feeling of what is working for both our family, and the boys' education. The downside in our circumstance is that we spend GOBS of time in this other town...cub scouts, birthday parties, playdates, school functions, etc! Living 20 minutes away isn't ideal...but it could be worse, I'm sure. We make sure that our dks are active in our local community...ie: Little League, Park/Rec Programs, activities with neighbors, etc. That way we feel that they're getting the "bonding" they'll need with some local kids for when they are going to school together in the future. I'd say, "go for it!", Jennifer!

[AnnW]

What hppens if you get "found out"? Can you legitimately transfer into that school? Here, we can go to any school in our district as a transfer if there is room, not just our "home" school. What is the general reaction at this school to people who live out of the area? Will there be hesitations about making play dates with someone who "doesn't live in the neighborhood"? Any resentments that you are choosing the school but not the neighborhood. Our school is at limits now, but a few years ago, the whole transfer issue was very controversial. Alot of people felt resentment that they had "paid up to live in the neighborhood and get the good school". Not saying it is right, but that's how it was. Will that happen at this new school?
When you move, will she still be able to go to this new school? Is this a school that she will stay in for all elementary? If you are going to move "in the next five years, hopefully sooner" couldn't you move it up?
What are your dh's hestitations?

[littlesista06]

Originally posted by AnnW
"What hppens if you get "found out"?"
There's really not that much to get "found out". She's getting before and after school care at my boss's house - just by me...I'll be the one putting her on the bus and getting her off.

"Can you legitimately transfer into that school?"
This is actually legit. But, I highly doubt that if I say, "I don't like my school, can I come here?" That they would look at that very seriously.
It's not like I'm just trying to get her in there and totally take advantage of it - dh and I are extrememly involved parents and want to be very frequent faces at dd's school - she, we and the school will all benefit from her moving - she will get a better education, we will have peace of mind, and the school will have two more very active warm bodies to lend hands whenever and wherever needed.

"Here, we can go to any school in our district as a transfer if there is room, not just our "home" school. What is the general reaction at this school to people who live out of the area?"
Well, I haven't taken a poll... but from what I understand this is common and I don't believe dd will stick out like a sore thumb.
We live in the area - within our area, there are 4 elementary schools - it's just the way the lines are drawn as to which one you go to.

"Will there be hesitations about making play dates with someone who "doesn't live in the neighborhood"?"
On my part or others part?
All schools around here pull from so many different neighborhoods/areas, you're driving your kids to a friend's house anyway. Besides, the majority of the kids at our church attend this school, so we know many families already.

"Any resentments that you are choosing the school but not the neighborhood. "
It's not A neighborhood that this school draws from but a wide range within the general area of the county. Our county is so large and spread out, it encompasses many different neighborhoods. I cannot imagine any resentments, it's not like we're planning on staying here and just bussing her in for the rest of her life. We just found out what a crappy school she is in - something that takes time to find out- and we don't want her to get behind just because we cannot put up a for sale sign in the yard this month.

"Our school is at limits now, but a few years ago, the whole transfer issue was very controversial. Alot of people felt resentment that they had "paid up to live in the neighborhood and get the good school". Not saying it is right, but that's how it was."
Totally understandable - but then again, this is not a "neighborhood school" it is a county school that pulls from many socio-economic areas. Hell, if I moved into some of the neighborhoods that this school does pull from, it'd be a step down.

"Will that happen at this new school?
When you move, will she still be able to go to this new school?"
We will only target moving to areas that the school pulls from.

"Is this a school that she will stay in for all elementary?"
That's the plan - it's K-5.

"If you are going to move "in the next five years, hopefully sooner" couldn't you move it up?"
I'm putting 5 years as the longest it would take to move. Like I said, we cannot put up a for sale sign this month, but possibly in the next year or two we can find somthing.
The county we are in is the largest in the surrounding area and it has the best school system.... everyone wants to get into a "XXXX County" school, so houses for sale are at a minimum, always. And we don't want to take the first one that comes along - we do want to move up and we also have to be careful that the house we choose, while it may be zoned to her elementary school, we have to be sure it's also zoned to the middle and high school we would like her to go to.

"What are your dh's hestitations?"
He wants me to sit on the info and think all the way through it. That's why I posted it here, b/c I knew questions would be raised that I may not have thought of.
He's just the kind of guy that goes shoe shopping and knows what he wants, sees it, but will have to make 2nd trip to buy it - because he has to think about it. I'm more likely to jump into a decision b/c it intially looks good.

[AnnW]

Sounds like there is no down side to this. When is the last date that you can register her for the school? Why not just wait, think about it, DON'T think about and then decide the week before.

[littlesista06]

Since she will be in 1st grade next year, we cannot register her until the day after school is out (June 15th). But I do have to turn in a permission slip for her to attend as soon as possible. We have to find out first if they will let her attend.... since it is a "daycare" issue.

[AnnW]

I would do that then, and then think about it till the "official" registration period comes.

[KarlaB]

I would definitely look into it. We are open-enrolling ds next year and on the application we filled out for it there was an option due to dc provider's location. For us we are open enrolling so dks will be in dh's district when they are in high school (sports reasons not so they are tormented by having him as a teacher LOL!) and because the school ds is supposed to go to has all day kindergarten and we don't want that.

[RCT]

Originally posted by littlesista06
Since she will be in 1st grade next year, we cannot register her until the day after school is out (June 15th). But I do have to turn in a permission slip for her to attend as soon as possible. We have to find out first if they will let her attend.... since it is a "daycare" issue.

this sounds like the way to go with this.... let us know what you end up doing....